What a Mamma Mia!

Anthology by Italo-Canadian women sets record straight

Family. Gender expectations. The struggle to accept one's own identity and dual heritage.
These are a few of the topics explored in Mamma Mia! Good Italian Girls Talk Back, an anthology of short stories written by 18 women from different age groups and walks of life who are joined by their common identity as Italian-Canadians. Stories range from funny to poignant, making the anthology both charming and smart as their writers recount their experiences of growing up in an Italian-Canadian household.
A freelance writer for The Toronto Star and novelist, Maria Coletta McLean collected the 25 stories that make up the anthology, and contributed her own piece, "Clever Little Compartments," a witty story about her childhood fondness for frozen TV dinners. Coletta McLean began the process of collecting stories as part of her monthly writing group at the Columbus Centre, where she wrote "Clever Little Compartments." From there, she got in touch with other authors writing pieces about their own cultural experiences.
Mamma Mia! Good Italian Girls Talk Back breaks down many preconceptions and stereotypes of the Italian-Canadian culture. "We're playing on the irony of [the phrase 'good Italian girl']," explains McLean. "A good Italian girl is supposed to sit quietly and not talk back, to learn a skill such as crocheting or learning how to cook. [As for the need to 'talk back'] we want to tell our stories, talk about some of the traditions of the Italian-Canadian society."
This theme of speaking up and setting the record straight about life as a female Italian-Canadian also gives the contributing authors a platform through which to voice the struggles and even injustices they faced growing up.
This subject is the central theme in Angela Capozzolo's "Figli Maschi," a story which explores the preferential treatment often given to boys in Italian-Canadian families. "It's a tacit understanding that boys are preferred; it's understood but never questioned," states Capozzolo, a Toronto high school teacher. "I didn't have any brothers myself but most of my cousins were boys. I remember the stories of my parents about my birth and how they preferred a boy. At first it was jokingly, but then I asked why? Why is no one questioning this? [It also came up] going to weddings [during which the married couple was toasted with a wish that they someday would have male children]."
This preference for boys meant that boys had the freedom to do as they pleased, while girls were expected to act in a certain way. "Girls are expected to be polite, to only take things if something is offered. Boys - cousins, neighbours, paesani - would eat everything. I remember one incident when they broke a window and quietly replaced it, telling me not to say anything," recalls Capozzolo. "I felt jealous of this little conspiracy. Italian custom accepts boys. There is a camaraderie between father and son; boys perpetuate the family name."
Mamma Mia! also speaks candidly about subjects that are generally considered taboo in the traditional Italian-Canadian community, such as divorce. For example, Sudbury-based writer and teacher Rosanna Battigelli's story "Food for Thought" focuses on the tension between mother and daughter because of the latter's divorce. "Marriage is expected to last forever in an Italian family, and it is a heartbreaking experience to 'old country' Italians when their children's marriage ends, especially if there are children," explains Battigelli. "I wanted to show the contrast between 'old country' and 'new country' ways of dealing with the divorce issue, since my family had dealt with the situation, as well as other friends and families of Italian origin."
It is this candid portrayal of the realities of the Italian-Canadian experience that Coletta McLean believes makes the anthology a unique and important addition to Italian-Canadian literature. "[This anthology] is honest and open and breaking new ground. Some of my favourite stories deal with heavy issues such as divorce in the Italian family, lesbians in the Italian family, curses passed on in the family."
While Mamma Mia! Good Italian Girls Talk Back seeks to break down cultural preconceptions, it also traces the contributing authors' struggle to accept their dual identity as both Italians and Canadians, and the difficulties associated with growing up with one foot in each world.
"Children of immigrants always know two worlds," says Ivana Barbieri, a Toronto-based teacher, whose story "Riding the Rails" recounts her voyages in Italy. "I went to Italy to uncover the Italian identity in me... It's something we kids of immigrants are always aware of, these two worlds: inside the home, and outside the home. In high school, I didn't want to be ethnic; I didn't embrace it until later. It wasn't trendy to be Italian. I changed my name briefly to Ivane. When Italian-Canadians became consumers, then it became chic. I didn't exactly embrace [my Italian-Canadian identity], I chose to live with it and accept it; it makes me who I am. It's part of maturing."
Capozzolo also remembers the difficulties she encountered growing up with two cultural frames of reference. "I was not ashamed [of my culture]... but I did feel different, an outsider. My classmates were predominantly Canadian and those who were Italian, their parents had been born here so they were removed from it. I started JK without knowing a word of English. There were awkward situations; I remember my mother struggling with English and I felt uncomfortable for her...But I realized there was nothing wrong with an accent; it affirmed who I was."
Mamma Mia!'s candour and rich mix of humour and poignancy is something which Battigelli believes makes the anthology stand apart. "This anthology is written with incredible honesty and candour that makes you feel every point of the pendulum of human emotion. It is a book that shakes you, that makes you laugh and cry, that moves you. I am very proud to be a contributing writer."
The collection also gives room for readers to express their own feelings and experiences about growing up in an ethnic household, whether Italian-Canadian or otherwise, as there are several blank pages at the back of the book where readers themselves can "talk back." Says Coletta McLean, "We want to encourage people, to allow them to express their own thoughts. One of the nicest things someone said about this book is that it's 'chicken soup for the Italian soul.' You realize that people have similar experiences and that these experiences are validated."
And as for the issue of "talking back," Barbieri stresses that this is a positive step forward for Italian-Canadian women. "It's not a negative thing. It's part of the duality of growing up in Canada... Let's put stuff on the table, let's talk about things that are taboo. It can be intense, even if [the story] is light-hearted. It's about bringing things to the forefront; it means we're thinking about stuff, and that's good."

Publication Date: 2004-07-25
Story Location: http://tandemnews.com/viewstory.php?storyid=4192